![]() Andrews is trying for creepy, but much of it is unintentional (in no other writer’s work do young women spend so much time spying on blood relatives Doing It), and several times I wondered whether I had forgotten yet another twist, namely that Audrina’s original desecration in the woods had taken place at the hands of her own father. In any other book, I might criticize the soapily abrupt “I don’t have any legs - that’s what!” Here, I was just glad that someone had finally arrived at the goddamn point, no matter how cloddishly. Either way, it’s an anticlimax each time I had completely forgotten former figure-skating champion turned double amputee turned Audrina’s mother-in-law-slash-sexual-stepmother Billie Lowe, but the character sketch is so mercilessly saccharine, the foreshadowing so graceless (yet opaque), and the subplot so irrelevant that, by the time Audrina began to say things like, “Hey, I wonder what’s with THE SUPER-LONG DRESSES BILLIE IS WEARING,” I could not have cared less. ![]() I would crack a joke here about spoiler warnings, but it’s a hallmark of My Sweet Audrina that, by the time any twist or dark secret is revealed in the text, the reader has either figured it out 70 pages ago, or lost interest completely. ![]() “I don’t have any legs - that’s what!” shrieked Billie. ![]()
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